POETRY

The standing and running homeless man,

tattered clothes falling off his body

naked below the waist

in the frigid afternoon

 

I walked a mile before running out of options

 

The standing and running homeless man,

leaping from sidewalk to sidewalk

with nothing to claim

but himself

directing the sacred to me

 

I found left over scraps of food on the train

 

The standing and running homeless man

leaving his clothes and empty cart,

in front of the business

with the wind at his moving pace,

retracing his self-connection to a moment out of time

 

I talked to Edward and James in their shelterless sanctities

 

I listen to mindfulness on the computer

after conflict

and never return

to who I’m supposed to be,

absorbing the sun

with the other side

of the standing and running homeless man.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

pg. 1

I am

with the squirrel

who leaps,

rapidly winding it’s tail

up and down

 

catching the peace

of the forest

in its hands,

with the acorn.

 

As wars and struggle persist,

 

the silence in this tree

the countless pine needles on the earth

the constant will to thrive

 

find me

finding simplicity.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

pg. 2

 

The wooden bench

I sat on

under the all encompassing sky

before your death.

 

The wooden bench we sat on

in the lack of time.

 

Me

back

to that wooden bench

older,

standing by myself

watching the waves

hurl into one another

like each crescendo

immediately eliminates

illusion after illusion

 

bluer than blue

sounding like

the purity of

foaming white, gray and green,

 

throwing

sand, pebbles, shells and rocks

around

 

like impermanence’s hand

holds mine

 

like a standing ovation

to the arena of realization

underneath the sand.

 

The togetherness

the twenty years

the suffering

the meteor shower we saw

the understanding…,

The journey of a thousand miles

begins with the first step.

 

 

pg. 3

We are

 

death

 

birth

 

in between-

vague, foggy cellars of mud

but you talk about hope;

the hope for something better

while in it’s essence

is a rabbit-hole cause

that sculpts finite expectations

that are not in the Now

 

I

am

not a catalog

in this catalogued

right-wrong mind-verse.

 

I’m

like the leaves of a tree in the fog

near the ocean
as transferrable as

water

 

like broken guitar strings

once a playing phenomenon

sitting on the train,

leaving Mexico City

heading back to California

and he tells me of a home

he made of snow and ice

standing stranded

in a no-where land,

with minus degree air

battering him,

while tempering his survival with

self proclaimed, inner-unbroken strength

and imagination,

 

like

a circular feast served freely.

 

pg. 4

In the tunnel tonight

are trees,

and lights

in the year of isolation and suffering-

I am this time

and find

a barren park

filled with

 

silence

 

like the source of all things

reclaimed

the mass of the womb

that now lies dormant again.

 

 

In the tunnel tonight,

are explosions

implosions

in the year of dead bodies

lying inside of time

finding this over-crowded park

we used to stroll in

changed like never before,

 

awakened and shut down

 

like the source of all things

has to reclaim

equanimity

and activate

wrinkles of peace

on populations of faces

wondering if tears are temporary shells...

 

or

the profound

flowing

and

stretching

hands

touching each vibration of

their freed voices singing

to George Floyd; “You didn’t die in vain”.

pg. 5

While the hours are heavy,

 

the violence seems to never stop

the seeds of compassion

don’t get sown enough

into our inner-grounds of honor

the planet heats up and disasters

swim all around

 

like fear being inhaled

without being able to exhale

creating

surreal, sped-up deaths

packaged on roads

that no longer

go anywhere

 

while what underlies is

You

Me

and Us,

at the core

 

like

untying the noose

of racism

to dissipation,

 

as the path to take.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

pg. 6

If i told you

that the world

is filled with mystery,

I’d tell you

about the Black Crow

 

out

in the blue, morning sky

flying swiftly

with raw and sheer power

generating

immersive impact

that goes

from flight to sight

from imagining to imagined

from part to whole

 

like a pool of

rippling pauses

 

dipping into

the observance

of transition,

 

isolation

instant appreciation

when night comes

in the different-same symphony.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

pg. 7

 

The starving children on a hill

squatting nearby our table

while we ate

while we gave

what was left

 

they came and licked every crumb

off the plates

barely able to smile to

one more day

living the life of poverty

as my parents’, parents, parents

once crawled from

or yours

or theirs

or somebodies

or my husband’s.

 

On top of a similar hill

he offered me an orange

as love gives to love

and I accepted

with an unchartered embrace

 

like the history

 

of our dried ashes

scattered

to the future

to the technology of wisdom

to the rarity of each passing moon lit phase

 

in Air

in Transparency

in Vulnerability.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

pg. 8

In the daylight

 

amidst the traffic,

a white butterfly roams from side to side

and then is gone

 

amidst the drive home, rushing- rushing

a deer with magical looking antlers

leaps over the sidewalk and runs out of sight

at timeless speed

 

amidst the freeway

where a river used to flow

now representing

domination and greed

a red shouldered hawk flies on the other side

into the wild brush

and then steadily glides away.

 

In the daylight, when out of the blue,

I acknowledge I don’t know anything

 

yet

 

and

 

at the same time

I think about the song

I want to sing and pass on

 

rather than delete

and live in fear.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

pg.9

 

Standing up for the abused women

Sheltering their unsheltered traumas

raising humanism back in the air

 

to a country, a system, a farce

of forced rape in action,

murder

making unnatural torture a

foregone consciousness…

 

a turnstile that goes round and round to madness.

 

Where is she now?

Where are we now?

 

Where is the core

of peaceful giving and kindness

like the rain

like the sun

 

that thrives?

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

pg. 10

 

She had some unresolved

lying,

some real

self-hate

 

like having a friend you want to impress

drop you off at someone else’s posh house

rather than yours

 

too embarrassed of your background

waving good bye, like you mean it

when you’re really walking

towards an aspect of yourself

who you’ve not met until now.

 

She had some time to kill and

resolved to let her ego go,

lying in torrential change.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

pg.11

Today.

 

The rain

dropped

like

the final tears

in the crash

of her life

I knew

and lived through…

the

Japanese Maple tree

heard this

and

grew

glowing

red

leaves.

 

Today.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

pg.12

 

I heard the owl hooting in two’s

with intermittent gaps

placing me back in time

to when my five year old nephew’s

first poem

about the candle

 

lighting his mind’s imagination

while the electricity was out

 

blew me away

like the power of the ocean’s waves crashing

and then calmingly

washing up against me

 

with soft lulls

of settled, swooshing water at my feet

standing on the shore

placing me back further in time

 

I remained awake

while sleeping

In the unchartered womb

of not wanting to be born

 

until I remained

In this chaos

feeling everything

 

like the sanctity of breath

like sustenance is collapse

and collapse is the first ray

of peace

fertilizing the carefreeness

of wanting nothing,

 

to the epitome of my wake.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

pg. 13

What if suffering

is really the beauty

of the clearest night

 

like the north star outside my apartment

that I see

when washing and drying my clothes

in the laundry room

 

what if every thing is perception

and yet perception isn’t everything

 

like a walk I once took

that was perfect

because I accepted myself

as imperfect

 

what if there’s no if

 

and only

the certainty of constantly letting go

of life and death

releasing inherent love

to

being touched

by stepping slowly in the multi colored patch

of weeds

presenting you to you.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

pg.14

The sun setting into a point of absoluteness

fears not of being misunderstood

fears not of being missed

fears not of being overlooked

because its origin is unspoken…”

 

I saw this

when I heard

silence

while stranded on a highway I’d never been

 

like the past

bleeding in to wisdom

erasing time.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

pg. 15

She

walks

into

the feeling of water

slowly and gently

going and coming

 

one that never ends nor begins

 

 

She

sees through the stars-

the brightest one

of the night

sinking into

ego

less

ness

 

like illumination

is a meditation

that

extends beyond the imagination

of alley ways and grave sites

 

 

She

finished

existing in real time,

 

transforming malice

through vision

Into compassion

unconditionally

 

 

like Daughters of Copper Woman.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

pg. 16

 

The cold night,

feels like clapping emaciated survivors

maybe even yelling

Why didn’t I have a chance to have food and shelter” .

 

The cold night

shone on me, 
as deep as the seasonal changes,

sounds of nature…

the dynamic swoosh when the geese land

the yapping until the coyotes are at the center of their land

the owl in the brush, making vibrational rhythms

the bobcat staring at me before I fully opened

my heart

 

The cold night

fading

coming

the longer I sit with it

the longer I reconcile my emotional bruises

that once were abrupt and all over the place

that once were a slap in the face,

like shadows bumping into each other

until confusion

is what I finally understood

Is understood by

everyone

 

The cold night

in the snow

that my sleep is awakened by.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

pg. 17

And I knew then,

 

after living in the midst

of the canyon’s grace

and power,

 

dying again and again

and again,

like a prayer, mantra

or affirmation,

 

that it wasn’t so hard to lie down

and die one more time

 

like an opinion to hate

gets mixed with love

on a bathroom wall

becoming art…

removing separation

 

like all the hues of red gold and pink

run with the chemistry of the sun

rising and setting

in impermanence

 

like the last time

you’ll ever speak

only to truly exist

as infinity.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

pg. 18

The gray fog

seals the sun’s light

for a little while

 

to allow

peacefulness

to allow

breath

 

like the virtue of

reflection

 

like driftwood

that’s been collected

for a greater purpose

 

like the woman

who gave a carved wooden angel

to a stranger

who lost everything

in a fire

and said,

Collective consciousness

is a necessity

for harmony

and loss

to be a

stepping stone,

that unlocks compassion.”

 

like drawing circles

in the sand,

learning to dance to

unexpected rhythms.

 

The gray fog

seals the sun’s light

for just a little while more

like me for just a little while more

washed up on the shore

unapologetically lost.

 

 

 

 

pg. 19

The Cricket

on the sidewalk close to the park

lying on it’s back

trying to turn to live

I saw

 

maybe it was Christ, the Buddha or the child

playing on the jungle gym learning to laugh

instead of cry.

 

 

The Cricket

on the sidewalk close to the park

with a limp and not able to move

trying to not try

I saw

 

and chanted to it

gently moving it over

to find it permanently

injured

to find me permanently

caring

in

the physical, spiritual

and expanded

world

of

no context

but purity

no context

but connection

no reason

but equanimity

 

and chanted

we are all important

when we are free to feel

this moment through love.”

 

 

 

 

 

pg. 20

 

An Addendum to the invention of

Western attachment

the chaos from

colonialism

doesn’t have to be our reality

only the habit to work in this

chaos and believe this is us,

destroys ”…

 

whispered in my fatigue, stress and loss

of self…

as loudly and profoundly

as the ocean’s moving roar

like shedding skin and despair

into compost

into inner light

driving fear,

the epitome of chaos,

Into evaporation

 

and opened my attachment

of hating myself

because of what I learned

and how I passed that on,

 

not because of who I am.

 

Who I am is kindness

 

who my seen and unseen

sisters, brothers, fathers, mothers

around the planet

and life

are…

related to

pure

living

dying

transforming

transcending energies

 

stretching not knowing

to dance effortlessly

with understanding

 

a forceless and wide open space. pg. 21

Here.

 

The salty air

the wind blowing

the Oyster Catcher returning

 

that I walk alongside

and across

the Pacific Ocean

steeped in

songs of water dances

 

of sea otters in and out of waves

of pelicans and diving cormorants

of caves carved by erosion

in and out of the sun

 

of a landmark Cypress tree,

it’s branches

extending towards everywhere

after the rain.

 

The extraordinary

beauty

is

a living gift

that never dies

that always creates

that is mindfulness.

 

Here.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

pg. 22

Breaking

the floods of pain apart

 

with

less

and less

less

and less

 

of myself

like no self

bargaining with silence

to make sense of loneliness

In the middle of a dust storm

entering the loom…

 

women

understanding

what weaving means,

hand-stitched evolutionary love

butchered to death by dominators

except not their origin

and purest strength,

the Earth,

unbreakable.

 

Selfless,

the hardest thing to be

circulates

learning

trying

discovering.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

pg. 23

 

Going slow

like when I clenched my hands

and broke down in disbelief

after my brother and mom

said my sister was dead

while the rain poured down

while the empty and sterile

hospital room

bore isolation

stacked on top of more of the same

at 15 years old

at no years old

at the dismissal of the inevitability of pain,

 

a place that lasted for decades

until it crumbled.

 

Going slow,

like the enveloping smell of mint

on the mountainsides

that guided my reflection

of depression

through the ultimate understanding

of conflict…

Oneness

 

a place that mirrors this moment.

 

Going slow,

like the tarantula in the dead of the heat

in the middle of the desert

in the vastness of scarce life

where peaceful influence originates

from the natural elements,

and awakens something within

me

which feels as though

stillness

is a supernatural teacher

on a dirt trail

emptying the shopping carts

of terrorism of self

of domination of family

of madness of culture.

pg. 24

 

A way to start

a sentence

about my life

when the moon isn’t visible

and the letters of inescapable sadness

are,

 

travels inside unlikely places

that seem unimaginable,

 

confusing at first

like when the rake got put to the side

and the lonely leaves still came together

after my father took his last breath

 

wandering farther and farther

away from the automatic routines

of regret for countless mistakes no child

can parent

getting closer to the heart.

 

A way to open up a sentence about my life,

 

like the ten thousand deaths

I’ve gone through

like the visible full moon I saw

while the blood coming from my brother’s

neck bled, bled and bled

until two p.m. in the morning

stumbling into the vortex

and dropping fear

into

the

depths of me

 

only to discover I’m energy before, during

and after

 

dancing to a healing beat

in the dark, calm, soundless Goddess.

 

 

 

 

pg. 25

 

Walking

standing still

 

walking

landing lightly

like a dream that isn’t,

 

reflects something

I’ve seen countless times

but for the first time

today.

 

Nay

but a

Canada Goose

skimming along

the entire surface

of a small lake,

egoless and strong,

with graceful speed,

 

the kind that knowingly

leaves imagination

In the atmosphere

like the presence

of a rainbow,

 

taking it’s movement

to a level of wholeness

like

a spacious freedom

born from the tendency

of the Fall.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

pg. 26

Let it go”

she said to me

 

Let what go”

I replied

 

The pattern of holding on to negativity”

She whipped at me, like a dagger sharpened by fright

 

So now I’m the problem”

I thrusted out with anger and misunderstanding

 

When you let the past be your ruler, Yes”

she precisely spoke,

moving away

until I couldn’t see her anymore

until I couldn’t see myself anymore

but just emptiness,

 

the kind that leaves you in shock

about losing everything,

getting up at 1 am

and crying at

not being able to pay the rent

or for remembering only one side

because it’s tangled

In the illusion

of

clashing

obligational dogma that isn’t yours to keep

 

What’s the point”

I brutally said to her

 

The point is

that there is none”

 

The point is

let whatever

it is,

go.

let your echoes

be

sounds

of self reflection in your mountain.”

pg. 27

Trees in the green grass

of nourishment and compassionate shade

of what’s always been there…

glistening, healing growth in the sun

and forests of peace.

 

Trees in the green grass

mentoring life lines

like the Valley of Sand Dunes and me

merging with the ocean

while the wind carried

us

to sit and be

 

to something greater,

from the sand grain

to the particles in the air the dragonfly

travels through.

 

Trees in the green grass

to sit and just be

without judgement.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

pg. 28

 

Amid the morning stirrings

the ocean crashes all around

 

I am with it.

 

Many others are waiting for me…

the Void

depthless

weightless

and especially

a Shooting Star

falling on my formless spirit.

 

I am not separate

from living inside a cave and living

in the unfamiliar.

 

The rocks, the sand, the voices of the wind

and branches bending down

bathe my birth with death and

bathe my death with birth

bathe the beautiful unknown that I am.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

pg. 29

The grayish-white, thick fog,

 

I walk through its immeasurable width

and rise into

tears of harmony

that took years to absorb.

 

My own temporariness

that lies in the king waves

parallels forces of nature.

 

This day comes to me

as a broken freedom

that feels like

opaque blood in my veins

only to pass.

 

Some change that’s not really change

always has been

like meditating on a blade of grass

in the storming wind

comes through

the grayish-white thick fog…

comes as an understanding that I’m

not alone, as I’d like to think.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

pg. 30

 

In being

human

are many different trails.

 

Mine led to an inner pulse

free of bias

letting anyone or thing

move, move, move, move, move

 

be, be, be, be and just be

as an embrace from someone you love

 

simultaneously

goal-less

abundance

coexistence.

 

Coexistence is abundance.

 

Little did I know

way back when

the sandstorm that pelted and blinded me

would grow into a feeling

of a cosmic and wise web

that’s been here forever

within many different trails.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

pg. 31

You and I

where do we begin,

 

In Los Angeles

In Las Vegas

In the womb

In the sunset’s loom

In the theater

In the movie

In the classroom

in the book

In the cemetery

In the family we shared over time

In the church

In the song

In your Prayers

In the laughter after our internal storms

In your living chapters

In my living chapters

In the absent chapters we dreamed about

In “I have a Dream”

In your Pastor

In my pastures

In our human caves of compassion

In our human mountains of love

In our last time together

before you left the material world?

 

With Realizations.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

pg. 32

 

 

 

With love to my ears

with listening to this moment of

 

the selfless body

the singing birds

the walk in the storm before the storm

before there was a before.

 

Their trills and melodies

in the willow, sedge, cat tail, oak, and redwood wild

beckon universal connectivity

break down falseness.

 

Listening to a million miles past a million miles

Is filled

with no bias

because there is no agenda

because there is no telling

the wind to stop drifting along.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

pg. 33

There isn’t any word that death hasn’t heard

There isn’t any hum that the bio diversity in Big Sur hasn’t sung

There isn’t any lesson the sand hasn’t been blown by

There isn’t any wave whose crescendo can’t follow or break

There isn’t any tree who stands alone

There isn’t any me who lives in a vacuum

 

 

The only direction is everywhere

The only direction is healing

The only direction is getting lost and feeling.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

pg. 34

Art is being excited to be alive

regardless of hatred, loss and ignorance

regardless of the heated, rocky limitations of health

In our naked strength that

I witnessed…

 

you,

lying in your fecal matter unable to move

me not understanding your physical decay

but facing this temporary moment with honesty.

 

 

Art is being timeless

wherever you are

in the iterations of a yellow-five petaled wildflower

on the mountain connected to the ocean

connected with

and out of the natural rhythm of seasons

like an exquisite dance that lasts for a second.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

pg. 35

 

I want to get up from this table,

walk out

and never return to this wheelchair,

to what I can’t do

forgetting everything

losing everything

 

The drive down the coast,

 

the silence of love

without any effort,

stopped and got out

saw the river flowing

while two saddened figures

turned into

the landscape

and went to the table they used to despair

turned it around

in a circular motion

until their homeless medicine

went back into the earth

like the willing experience of

of a story.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

pg. 36

The trip took them to never enough time to go through pain.

 

The ocean rested deeply with clarity

and they said,

I wish I could go swimming

I love the water

I have no time”

 

their crying slipped into

the sun and clouds and stayed in their proximity

the dolphin they saw

was the sea lion they saw

was the constant movement they felt

where their journey once had been

waking up on

the old hillside

with the bus arriving at humidity’s pace,

sweat on everybody and nobody

speaking in foreign internalizations

 

without understanding what they were about.

 

So pain continued and went through to who knows where

then reappeared in a needle’s eye

held by a peace maker

exploding into awareness

with no desire to hide

the endless depth of brilliance

blowing their war zones into

a woven swim in a timeless stoke of trust.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

pg. 37

The Visit.

 

The Artist’s Mentor

thirty years later

screaming at the top of her lungs,

throwing herself against the wall

and letting anger rage and rage and rage

fueling another reality that no one understands

but experiences with her,

and the soothing shadows in the bright sunlit room.

 

The Dream after we go.

 

The friend,

loved by everyone

and dying

like the rest of us

who do not know what comes next.

 

The Summer-less season.

 

The vacation

that turned into a funeral service

while the hawk landed next to their sadness

communicating to one soul

that transformation

is the other corner we stand on.

 

The Awakened Breath.

 

You stood there in a pink paisley shirt

glowing

with the purity of water and light

not dependent on time,

saying hi to me

not married

not writing

not fearing

 

smiling, standing, carefree

like the breeze growing into tomorrow.

 

 

 

 

pg. 38

September

let my heart travel to the sky.

 

The deep, loud and penetrating hooting

from a close distance

drew me towards the tall Cypress tree.

 

The Great Horned Owl flew

from one branch to another tree

like the vibration

of a sacred power

shaking off the dust of existence

humbling me.

 

I stood below, bowing to this moment

while all of a sudden

a shooting star came and went

as clearly as the naturalness of impermanence,

as lasting as imagination.

 

 

 

September

I wish,

let my indiscreet love for the wisdom of pain

travel no less

than the

coexistence of the wild

that we are…

the vibration of a sacred power

that’s egoless.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

pg. 39

There are so many things we don’t know and can’t see

 

Miracle

 

There are so many drops of rain that last forever in the heart

of human memories

during a drought

 

Miracle

 

There’s a feeling when you touch a stone that

listens to humanity cry

like the migrations it made to find you

holding each other in the sun

 

Miracle

 

There are steps I climb after dying of homelessness

In the mind

 

Miracle

 

There is a pupil of suicide,

Goddess knows where they learned from,

that later

lived in silence in a cave and died

naturally of joy instead

 

Miracle

 

There’s nothing left to hold on to

 

Miracle.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

pg. 40

Winding down,

 

the sunset,

blazing

orange

Winter

infinite strip

across the ocean

across the break

from rain

across my stride

across eighteen years

of dying and laughing pain.

 

 

Bright black,

 

wind of silence

in the earth

in me

like my own self

is everything

in the depth of

light

winding and winding

the music of love

to play

out in nature

where we began

and where

we remain

while

always moving

in harmony

no matter how many times

we’re blown apart.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

pg. 41

In my vision, I exclaimed, “hey there” to my ancestors.

 

The other people

and the rest of the people

 

joined hands

and danced

like a

dust storm laughing

and

erupting in the dark

 

like

the girl

climbing the rocky caves

going up

only to fall to the bottom

learning to crawl

with healing languages

 

alive

and feeling

 

the pulse of love

the pulse of hovering

moments of rays

lifting life and death

like something always never was

that is a planet.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

pg. 42

 

Take note of

I

Feel my steps

I

 

Take note of

the light of night

the full moon on the lake

the light of day

the sun on the ocean

 

Take note of

voices

who no longer need dimensionality

and are unconcerned by conventions

 

She

my mother,

Look at the shimmering movement,

like diamonds dancing on the surface of water,”

me,

What’s underneath and inside?”

 

Take note of

the Way,

as the sun is fading

as the night is arriving

as the night is leaving

as the sun is coming

for the natural cycles are the breathes we take

without bloodshed, without war, without ego,

without hatred, without blame

but with the organic legacy

of acceptance, awe and depth

 

Take note of.our

unfathomable human kindness

looking

finding

finding

looking

In the tree.

 

 

pg. 43

Rounding out the run

 

the run that never ends

never changes anything

 

why does she do this again

and again…

 

after she cried in fear

on the old worn out rug

in the dark

alone

like the responsibility

of marrying life

shiny on the outside

very disastrously

unclear on the inside

 

the real poverty was some

mysterious

shame

she’d been born into without

knowing it’s origin

 

Rounding out the birth-death life

in a dream,

the snakes formed a totem pole

In the center of a circle

and she awoke to the

difference

of not running away

from not knowing

and clinging to something that’s

not who she is and

opened her hands,

for the first

time

in her human history to choice.

 

The pale-lemon yellow five petaled

wild flower on the mountaintop

she saw

was the moment of truth.

 

pg. 44

 

Green,

 

the rich and painful lessons

when you fade and there’s

no familiar

hand to hold

anymore

but change

 

the spaces between

your comings and goings

dependent

on how we treat

the earth

 

of ancient and present universes

Interlocked with love

that dehumanizing laws

may try to deny

 

Deep, deep

High, high

Side, Side

 

The interlocked love

is what color is,

round and alive as can be.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

pg. 45

The faces in the light shining through

the glass windows on the second story

of the church

burst into it’s own sun

set

set

and let set

beyond places or things

 

becoming the real living

not afraid to be invisible rites of passage

based in the simplicity of

what the walk is all about;

 

continual explosions intermixed

with continual unknowns

of cracks, fissures and collapses

on the journey of peace

breaking through the illusory House

of the faces of war,

born and bred to lust fear

at all costs.

 

 

Ready or not,

facing your face is inevitable.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

pg. 46

Hanging down from the bench

where I loved you

I let myself change

when you died

and shared letting go

with the ocean’s view

looking back at me

and everyone else

like a motion of benign

power

that morphs into countless

elements

beyond comprehension

 

to the silence in a life

of rocks, pebbles, sand and love,

comprehending

comprehending

comprehending

 

the purpose of ripples.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

pg. 47

Palm tree,

car passing by

dogs barking

nobody walks

somebody walks

laundry being carried down the street

to the nearest laundromat

 

It’s closed

it’s not open

It’s open

it’s out of business

 

the lights are burned out

the focus isn’t anything

the memories are gone for good

the next door neighbor moved

and left their baggage at your doorstep

the address is unknown

the place isn’t a place anymore

 

finding yourself starved

finding a beach you’ve never been to

finding a lost art and letting it go

finding that you don’t have directions

to your destination

and getting into your shapeless skin

anyway

reversing the finite

 

to on and on and on

and on

 

until your breath is

something different

that’s never the same

as tangible and mysterious as

the metamorphosis of a butterfly.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

pg. 48

The rays of light

circular and everywhere

is seen In one spot of the forest

 

 

The native

Waterfalls

channeling

Into the ocean,

 

like gravity colliding with snow flakes

but are more like

true freedom of expression

 

to me and the Buddha statue

sitting on a rock with a plateau

always balanced and standing

always reading connections.

 

 

The quietude of green
earth brown

red

blue

yellow

vibrate back to

the rays of light

like mutually consenting

synchronizations

beyond explanations

rooted in rootless dimensionality

rooted in the human

stepping into nature

the nature

stepping into the human.

 

 

The rays of dying

burn attachment down to the now

circular and everywhere.

unseen and sacred

like a tree in the dessert

but more like

the seeds of change growing into

awareness.

pg. 49

There you are,

there you aren’t

blind as blind can be

more than more can give

tasting like when you fell in the shower

bleeding, not able to get up,

me horrified by your pride

only

to turn around as if an endemic chant

was born and raised from within our soil

that helped me help you

that helped you help me

while in this midst of what we once knew

evaporated before our eyes

 

who we were is no longer who we are

 

we tumble and fall

fall and tumble to no where

we scream and divorce

we hold each other when we don’t

know what else to do

 

who we were is no longer who we are

 

that’s where the transcendence lives

that’s where the broken bench

that got blown away

with us on it realized

we are not who we are without

what love we can give

like the peach colored roses outside

your hospital bed looking at you,

looking at me,

never to stop growing beauty in the veins

of intention.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

pg. 50